I’d like to pretend that my headspace is immune to things that I don’t want in there, that I’m perfectly capable of protecting the distance between my ears from unhelpful and distracting things… I’m just not. I try to pray, and all I can think about is Star Wars, or the to-do list, or that comment someone made. I try to clear my head before going to bed, but a million distracting thoughts keep me awake in a nervous frenzy.
At the risk of more “unprecedented times” verbiage, this past year has certainly exacerbated this problem as so many good things have been taken away, and there is just a general quiet anxiety surrounding all of us. But the Lord has been working in powerful ways through the midst of all of this, and so, dear reader, I hope that I can share with you the fruit I have experienced.
The most valuable lesson I learned is the need to protect your headspace; the distance between your ears where you tend to spend so much of your time and attention. And so, to discuss this, we’ll mix it like a cocktail: a shot of theology with five garnishes.
Romans 12:1-2 has marked this entire journey for me:
“I appeal to you therefore, brothers and sisters, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your minds, so that you may discern what is the will of God – what is good and acceptable and perfect.”
I have seen Christians use the phrase “do not be conformed to this world” to justify being misanthropic or (if we’re speaking honestly) just plain weird, with hardly a thought for the rest of the verse. St. Paul is packing so much into these 65 words, stating that the mission of the disciple is to offer their very lives over to the Lord, and that in doing so we make an act of worship to the Lord. The command to be non-conforming to the world is situated only in the transformation of our minds in Christ. The reason why we are called to live differently from the world is because we are called to live like Christ through the offering of our bodies and our minds to Him in a profound act of worship.
God wants to work a complete transformation in you, and if that is the case, then the Lord cares about your headspace. I don’t know who needs to hear this, but the Lord cares about your mental health and wants to be with you in your struggles. He calls you to transform your mind in Him: in His presence, with His accompaniment, guided by the Holy Spirit.
When I came to realize this, it led to a totally different ballgame. Rather than running from the discomfort or ignoring the nervousness, it became a point of closeness with the Lord, for I was able to invite Him into the acute struggles and confess my need for Him, even while everything in my head wanted to run the other direction. He began to show me the things that entered my headspace that were distracting or unhelpful. He showed me habits I had that increased anxiety, and how I gently needed to work on them in order to move forward. Finally, He showed me His power and grace as He brought about transformation that was only possible through Him, with Him, and in Him. He continually asked me a question that I now pose to you dear reader, as part of the ongoing transformation in Christ to which we are all called:
“How is the Lord calling you to guard your headspace?”
Nicholas Vance is a seminarian studying for the Archdiocese of St. Paul and Minneapolis. A West St. Paul native, he came back to the Faith his freshman year of college, and became involved with Saint Paul’s Outreach and the Catholic Studies community. He graduated from the University of St. Thomas in 2018 with degrees in Communications & Journalism and Catholic Studies. A rueful marathoner, a Röpke-Wojtyła Fellow with the Catholic University of America, and a once-upon-a-time youth minister, he loves hiking, reading, playing music, and the delightful first sip of coffee in the morning. He proudly calls Transfiguration in Oakdale (“the rockin’ East Side”) his home parish, and is in seminary formation at the Saint Paul Seminary.